True Friends....D's Second Time Solo

Sup guys....back again for my second post.

The recent severing of ties with my best friend of the last eight years has me thinking. Mostly I'm think about true friends. How is it you can know someone so well for so long then without you realizing it...something changes? You're not given a chance to sort it out before the other person has made the foregone conclusion that the friendship is over. It sucks. How is it someone you've formed such a strong bond with could turn around and stab you in the back with such hateful words? He forgot that he was like a brother to me - and dropped me like a bad habit.

I'm speaking of course, of Chris.

He has been my friend thru a lot of hard times, including the beginning of this weight loss battle. But, due to no fault of my own he will not be through the end.

Instinctively I think to myself...."this must be my fault". Then I think "Is it really my fault we're in 2 different places...both geographically and mentally?" Chris lives in Texas - his family moved 2 years ago. I've graduated college, he dropped out. I live in the real world, he works in retail and hangs w. high school kids.

I've spent the last week beating myself up emotionally over Chris's departure. However, my eating and exercise regimen have not slipped one bit.

I was watching TV with my mom, and she likes this show called "Potter's House". It's a show with a minister (Bishop TD Jakes) and he talks about religion - but in a cool, relative way.

The episode we watched seemed like it was made for me.

He said "If someone leaves your life, you cannot convince them to stay. You can't make someone love you, want to be with you, want to stay friends". If someone walks out of your life....let them keep walking. People who leave your life for a different group of friends never really loved YOU...just the idea of you. When they found someone who could give them the same things, with less effort on their part they were gone. He also said "When you get to the top of wherever you are going, you need to thank everyone who challenged you and everyone who abandoned you on your journey - they made you what you are".

Fuck everyone who has ever left my life. I've been alone for so long that it's easy for me. In fact, it's better. I have my family, I have a few close friends, that's all I need. I don't need fake, bullshit relationships - you're either 100% in or 100% out. Chose one.

In the case of Chris, our lives grew apart and our priorities changed. Big time. That being said, I don't wish him any ill will....I just wish he could have stuck by me a little longer. But, everything happens for a reason.

I asked Sam how many true friends she has and she said she can count them on one hand. The people she loves and trusts explicitly are few and far between. I think to myself "This is how it should be. How can you have true friends in quantity...this isn't a wholesale club".

In closing - the people who have left my life are gone forever. There is no refriending, reunions, reuniting on Facebook. Fuck that. I know exactly where I am going, and knowing where I've been and now that you've left - I know the old saying is true "life goes on".